Tale of the Tape(i)
Hey if anyone is reading this, check out the newly installed link to Corey and Anting's blog about their experiences in Taiwan--great pictures and entertaining commentary.
Listening to one or another of Jay Chou's live albums, the part where he has the good sense to play two of my favorites back to back: "Garden Tour Festival something or other" and "Tornado" got me thinking. Got me thinking about how I could use my hard won KTV skills here in America. Frankly, kareoke is beneath me. So i screamed the chorus to "Tornado" out the kitchen window at the idling cars on Fairfax Avenue. That seemed to work. When i finally got my car back on the road after a year away, I found American Bai Anjie was apparently really into Wilco and going through a Paul Simon phase. Taiwanese Bai Anjie's tastes run to pop and so-called r'n'b.
I miss the little ants that seasonally kept me company. My apartment in LA has none. I remember in the darkest hours of the ICLP winter, talking to them, and being a little dissappointed when another batch of little friends died off. Of course, at the same time I talked with them, I was also sponsoring the ant death camps that are marketed under the name "No-mo-ant" (the single most effective product in recorded history, by the way)
ROC vs. USA
"Tale of the Tape(i)"
Reflex Development
ROC: Always dodging scooters, cars, children
US: Generally nothing to dodge.
Edge: ROC
Mail delivery
ROC: Where is the mailbox anyway? Chinese junkmail+ free tissue paks=no stress.
US: Let's face it, the mail brings fresh problems everyday. Bills, problems. Actually in LA you are lucky to get your mail at all.
Edge: ROC
Refrigerated eggs
ROC: Non-existent
US: Ohh I loves eggs.
Edge: US
Availability of Snapple
ROC: None
US: It's everywhere--my favorite flavor is tasting a little sweet though. Have I been Taiwanized? I dare not visit a bakery for fear that I've ruined my sweettooth for ever. I am comforted in the US by the wall of Gatorade in the supermarket. How can a democracy function without having Gatorade at the ready?
Edge: US
I have checked steak, pizza, and ice cream, and a burrito the size of a football off my list of things to eat immediately. I also had my first $4 milkshake since I got back. I have had "Chinese"once since I got back, at a place called Gengis Cohen's on Fairfax. Incidentally, that night, I ate dinner with Keanu Reeves, or more precisely, in a booth next to his. Watching a bearded celebrity play with his dirty hair while you eat, that's something you definitely can't get much of in Taipei. Anyhow, it's hard to resist the conclusion that portion sizes are out of control in the US and that is why we're all fat. More later (after I have my first piece of chocolate cake.)
Listening to one or another of Jay Chou's live albums, the part where he has the good sense to play two of my favorites back to back: "Garden Tour Festival something or other" and "Tornado" got me thinking. Got me thinking about how I could use my hard won KTV skills here in America. Frankly, kareoke is beneath me. So i screamed the chorus to "Tornado" out the kitchen window at the idling cars on Fairfax Avenue. That seemed to work. When i finally got my car back on the road after a year away, I found American Bai Anjie was apparently really into Wilco and going through a Paul Simon phase. Taiwanese Bai Anjie's tastes run to pop and so-called r'n'b.
I miss the little ants that seasonally kept me company. My apartment in LA has none. I remember in the darkest hours of the ICLP winter, talking to them, and being a little dissappointed when another batch of little friends died off. Of course, at the same time I talked with them, I was also sponsoring the ant death camps that are marketed under the name "No-mo-ant" (the single most effective product in recorded history, by the way)
ROC vs. USA
"Tale of the Tape(i)"
Reflex Development
ROC: Always dodging scooters, cars, children
US: Generally nothing to dodge.
Edge: ROC
Mail delivery
ROC: Where is the mailbox anyway? Chinese junkmail+ free tissue paks=no stress.
US: Let's face it, the mail brings fresh problems everyday. Bills, problems. Actually in LA you are lucky to get your mail at all.
Edge: ROC
Refrigerated eggs
ROC: Non-existent
US: Ohh I loves eggs.
Edge: US
Availability of Snapple
ROC: None
US: It's everywhere--my favorite flavor is tasting a little sweet though. Have I been Taiwanized? I dare not visit a bakery for fear that I've ruined my sweettooth for ever. I am comforted in the US by the wall of Gatorade in the supermarket. How can a democracy function without having Gatorade at the ready?
Edge: US
I have checked steak, pizza, and ice cream, and a burrito the size of a football off my list of things to eat immediately. I also had my first $4 milkshake since I got back. I have had "Chinese"once since I got back, at a place called Gengis Cohen's on Fairfax. Incidentally, that night, I ate dinner with Keanu Reeves, or more precisely, in a booth next to his. Watching a bearded celebrity play with his dirty hair while you eat, that's something you definitely can't get much of in Taipei. Anyhow, it's hard to resist the conclusion that portion sizes are out of control in the US and that is why we're all fat. More later (after I have my first piece of chocolate cake.)
posted by 白安傑 @ 1:35 PM
1 Comments:
At 11:19 AM,
凱珊 said…
Snapple tastes way too strong, and way too sweet. I've been Taiwanized. Arizona sweet tea has also lost its appeal. I would pay large amounts of money (that I don't have) for a large grapefruit green tea from the QK at gongguan.
I haven't tried dunkin' donuts yet. I'm afraid that it won't be the same.
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